marriage gone bad

there has been lots of discussion among my girlfriends about boyfriends/husbands and marriage…the good, the bad and the last straw. when i read this story today i didn’t quite know whether to post it or what to say. i decided to just file it under “maybe my husband/boyfreind isn’t so bad”

it starts off with an eye-catching headline~~

Man denies sawing off wife’s head

okaaaaaay, it continues with the facts about the couple~~

Sally Sinclair, 40, was found with more than 30 stab wounds at their home in Amport, Hampshire, in August 2008.

At the time, she was head of business analysis at the mobile phone firm’s world headquarters near Newbury, Berks.

Alisdair Sinclair, 48, formerly of Georgia Lane, Amport, admitted he and his wife were involved in a knife fight in which she died but denies murder.

Winchester Crown Court heard the attack in the kitchen of their rented luxury property was partly witnessed by children, who cannot be named for legal reasons.

really sad that they had to start this arguement in front of their kids~~now a description of the fight~~

The defendant said that when his wife of 21 years finally admitted during an argument to having an affair, he ran at her with his fists raised.

Mr Sinclair told the jury she got a knife from a block and stabbed him in the hands, which led him to also grab a knife.

They started swiping at each other before he slashed her throat.

He said his wife fell to the floor and he could not remember any more of the attack, which also caused a number of injuries to her legs, back and torso.

terrible but not unheard of~~this is where it starts to cross the line into bizaare~~

When asked about “sawing” injuries to her neck, which appeared to be an attempt to cut her head off, he replied: “I have no reason to cut someone’s head off, I’ve never cut someone’s head off.

“It’s a dreadful, dreadful thing and I have no knowledge of it.”

now, what kind of guy is this?? that could do something like this?

The court heard Mr Sinclair had been a house husband for almost 10 years while his wife worked.

His duties included domestic chores and looking after their four motorcycles and 13 cars, which he admitted he hardly ever drove.

Mr Sinclair said he was the only one who withdrew money from the couple’s joint account and said he would pay for almost all purchases in cash because he was scared of credit card fraud.

When asked if he behaved obsessively about money, he said: “I managed the money so we didn’t get into debt, I was obsessive to the point I wanted to avoid fraud.”

getting a picture??

Christopher Parker QC, prosecuting, asked him if he allowed his wife to withdraw cash for herself to which he replied: “We were equals.”

He then asked him: “Up until she told you she wanted a divorce, were you in control of the finances in the same way you controlled much of her life?”

Sinclair replied: “Our marriage was sharing, we shared everything, we were honest.”

The trial continues.

i think the lesson from this is, there are clues…clues that the person you are living with is just not quite right. if this woman thought that her husband was “normal” …she was blind, deaf and dumb…but of course she wasn’t, was she?? she was an executive…who also was having an affair?

why, why, why do people stay in marriages, raising kids in such chaotic homes?? how could an intelligent woman think that getting a divorce~~~~no matter how much it cost, how difficult, painful or drawn out it could become, would be worse than this??? i think she waited about 10 years to long to try and kick this guy to the curb.

the moral of the story? don’t ignore the signs~~if your spouse is obsessive~isolated~jealous~secretive~controlling~~it could be the tip of the iceberg…

for the rest of us~~lucky enough to be with a forgetful, video game playing, leaves socks on the floor type guy~~it could be worse….much worse!!!



3 thoughts on “marriage gone bad

  1. Well first of all if they have thirteen cars he wasnt that obsessive over money, they must have had tons of it.

    secondly this reminds me of like 19th century women’s rights stories…The Awakening, The Yellow Wallpaper, Doll’s house etc…If you were a housewife who took care of the whole family plus finances and your husband only had to go to work everyday and bring home some bacon and you found out he was cheating wouldnt you snap? Kind of like Lorena Bobbit?
    I think i would

  2. this is one wacky and sad story. as a friend of mine put it when i passed it along: “oh my”.

    it sounds like there was dual insanity here.

    but i agree, it does give some perspective. for one thing, we would never own 13 cars….

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